I don't get it. That was non-alcoholic champagne.

As promised, before Friday, the week 1 scores for the Tournament of Champions.

In terms of actual Quizo scoring, our top five this week were Das Boot (43), Alias Pseudonym Undercover (43), Filipino Grigio (40), Oprah's Book Club (38) and The Darg Whores (37), rewarding 5 through 1 tournament points, respectively.

Bonus points this week went to:

- Filipino Grigio, Rod Thorgelson's Armada and The Pros From Dover all got one bonus point for playing with two people. The Apes of Wrath gets two bonus points for playing solo.

- Alias and The Pros From Dover got bonus points for each getting a perfect 10 on round 1.

- The bonus point for Best Map went to Filipino Grigio for this gem, on the Carpathian Mountains question in round 4:

Love the stick figure.

- "Only team in the bar to get a question right" went to Alias for being the only team to know The Firm in the speed round, the Darg Whores for knowing Yale's daily newspaper, and Das Boot for knowing that Santana + The Steve Miller Band + The Tubes = Journey.

- As to the "Best Wrong Answer" bonus, I was torn - seriously torn - between Two and a Half Years of Quizo Down the Drain (FKA the De-SEPTA-Cons) answer of "Siddhartha"for the deceased Prime Minister of Indonesia (Herman Hesse books != Indonesian chief executives) and Rod Thorgelson's Armada's answer to the same question of "Gene Hackman Michael Caine," based on their continual application of the Hackman/Caine rule. In the end I was so torn about it I decided to give it to both of them. Congratulations, I've already broken one of my own rules.

- Finally, a discretionary bonus point was awarded to Two and a Half Years of Quizo Down the Drain for their performance on the speed round, in which they put "Temple of the Dog" for seven different answers, none of which were actually the band that IS Temple of the Dog. Apparently you do get points for trying. Who knew?

After one week then, the standings - in soccer we would call this a "table" - looks like this:

Team Name	Total Overall Tournament Points	Total Overall Quizo Points
Alias Pseudonym Undercover	6	43
Das Boot	6	43
Filipino Grigio	5	40
Oprah's Book Club	2	38
Darg Whores	2	37
The Pros From Dover	2	35
Rod Thorgelson's Armada	2	31
Two and a Half Years of Quizo Down the Drain	2	31
The Apes of Wrath	2	22
That's What Happens To Gay Cowboys	0	25
Built Kozempel Tough	0	21

"Total Overall Quizo Points" is how we resolve ties between teams with the same number of tournament points (what, again in soccer we would call "goal difference"). If, as it is after this week, two teams are still tied, the next tiebreaker (and I can't believe how technical we're getting here) would be the number of players on a given team, which is how Alias is currently top.

There you have it, folks. The Tournament of Champions rolls on...

JLK