Your 16 Unanswered Points Quizo Update

They say in football - in your garish American football, that is - that defense wins championships.

If this is the case than the Eagles are farther away from winning the Super Bowl than they ever have been since the team's founding, since as near as I can figure the Birds have the worst defense in the history of sports. You heard it here, folks, and I'm standing by it: worst defense in 3000 years. The freaking mascot could cover his defensive assignments better than the first team does now. And he could probably play linebacker as well, which isn't really a case of playing the position "better" since the Eagles apparently have abandoned the idea of even HAVING linebackers at all.

Yesterday DID see what will go down as one of, if not THE Premiership goal of the season in Chelsea's 1-1 draw with Arsenal, which for my money was also the single best "real football" game of the year so far. 90 terribly entertaining minutes, although towards the end Dr. Matt (of previous runaway winners I Did Zidane's Sister) and I argued over the commentators' use of the word "absorbing" to describe the action as I thought that unfairly likened the game to a paper towel.

So as sports days go yesterday ended up 50/50 on the good/bad scale - I can't rate the Eagles' win as "good" since the defense makes me want to, like, ritually cut myself. Like the guy in the new Stephen King book, which I am still 200 pages from the end of. This theatre thing (Medea, opening January 11 at Second Stage, 2030 Sansom, tickets $20) really eats into my books-and-video-games time. Don't even get me started on the fact that I have three unwatched episodes of Grey's Anatomy on the DVR.

You thought I wouldn't work the Medea (opening January 11) reference in there (Second Stage, 2030 Sansom) this week? For shame (tickets $20).

JLK